Pick Your Battles Are you really outgunned, or are you just being outmaneuvered? find out how to tell the difference.

I take strong issue with negotiating gurus who declare thateverything is negotiable. That just ain't so. Perhaps there ismore room to bargain than we sometimes imagine. But when you'rethe little guy, expect your opponents to protect their time andposition by steamrolling you.

According to ancient Chinese military genius Sun Tzu, "Hewho knows when he can fight and when he cannot will bevictorious." As always, put yourself in the other side'sshoes. Businesses often establish uniform policies to help them runsmoothly and economically-policies that, for good reason, are setin stone. A large company isn't likely to retool its accountingsystem, product line or management structure on demand. To dootherwise invites confusion in the ranks, mistakes and potentialliability. This rationale we can accept.

At other times, however, taking an issue off the table is justanother way to bully you. The trick is knowing the difference.Here, the value of your business network becomes obvious. Your bestsources of information are either inside that company or have yearsof experience negotiating against it. In some cases, the type ofbusiness intelligence you need can be bought from professionals orvarious kinds of information brokers. And if you're feelinglucky, try the Internet. There are pearls in the public record;Google and other search engines may help you find them.

In any event, you'll have to negotiate. Try to keep youragenda short. Stay focused on the issues that are most important toyou. There is a time and place to make dozens of demands, but notwhen you're playing David to the other side's Goliath. Useyour slingshot-it can be extremely effective.

Expect resistance. You can take "no" for an answer,but not without a plausible explanation. Question the glibnegotiating cliches you'll hear: "That's how we alwaysdo it." "It's our policy." "Take it orleave it." Use open-ended questions-those that can't beanswered with a simple "yes" or "no" and thatbegin with "who," "what," "where,""when," "why" or "how." They will getthe other side talking. Sometimes you'll buy what they say.Other times, it'll be painfully obvious that you're beingsandbagged by your opponent's sloth and inertia.

In rare instances, you may go over someone's head, but thiscan easily backfire. Strong managers stand behind subordinates.Later, that subordinate will be waiting for a piece of you. Anotherpopular technique is the "most favored nations" clause-acontractual obligation to treat you no less favorably than theother people who are also making deals with that company. Onoffense, it ties you to someone with more clout. As a fallback, youmay not get the point you want, but at least you'll knowyou're not the only one.

A speaker and attorney in Los Angeles, Marc Diener is authoring of theDeal Power.