Stop Saying 'I'm Bad at Remembering Names.' Use These Simple Tips to Break the Bad Habit Once and For All. Many of us have experienced what it's like to learn someone's name and forget it just minutes later. Here's how to finally remember names.
By Ivan Misner Edited by Jessica Thomas
Opinions expressed by BIZ Experiences contributors are their own.
Most of us have experienced the anguish of forgetting someone's name while they're standing right in front of us. It's like a mental game of hide-and-seek that you're destined to lose. But there's hope — this seven-step plan to turn your name-guessing game into a name-recalling masterpiece. Prepare to impress at social gatherings and business events, all while keeping your pride intact.
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Stop the name-shaming
Let's break this vicious cycle of saying, "I'm bad at remembering names." If you keep telling yourself you're bad at something, your brain will believe it and throw in the towel before the networking event begins. So, let's all raise our imaginary glasses and toast to a new mantra: "I've got this. I can be better at remembering names."
Repetition repertoire
Imagine this: You're introduced to someone, they say their name is Jamison, and you think, "Alright, Jamison, got it." Fast forward five seconds, and it's like your brain just performed a vanishing act. The solution? Repetition. Ask them to repeat their name like you're savoring the sound. "Jamison," then, if appropriate, say something relevant to the moment like: "That's a memorable name; why did your parents name you that?"
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The name ninja technique
You've nailed the repetition, but now what? Integrate their name into the conversation. Say things like, "How did you hear about tonight's event, Jamison?" As you continue to talk, respond by using their name a few times. "Wow, that sounds amazing, Jamison!" Towards the end of the conversation, ask them what social media platform they are most active on. Then, ask for one of their business cards and note the social media platform they like to use. The conversation and the business card will help anchor their name in your mind.
Association amusement park
For some people, remembering names is like playing a wild game of word association. So, if you meet a Jamison who's really into football and travel, picture this: Jamison wearing a football helmet, kicking a suitcase across a field while shouting travel tips. Vivid mental images stick like peanut butter to the roof of your mouth. Bonus points if it makes you chuckle in the middle of a serious conversation. Whatever form of association you make, dedicate the name to memory. Make associations in your mind. Write notes, and when you are back home, review your meeting and try to remember what that person looked like and what they were saying and doing. You might want to send a quick "nice to meet you" message online to help you remember your conversation with them.
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The phonetic finesse
If you've ever stumbled over someone's name like it's a tongue-twister on steroids, try this technique. Ask them if they prefer their name to be pronounced in a particular way. Not only will you earn extra points for courtesy, but you'll also have a unique mnemonic device to remember their name. For example, if they say, "It's pronounced Jay-muh-sun," you'll remember them pronouncing their name.
The visual anchor
For some people, associating the person's name with a distinctive feature of their appearance is helpful. If Jamison has striking green eyes, imagine him surrounded by jam jars made of emerald glass. This technique capitalizes on the power of visual memory, making it easier to recall their name by conjuring up their unique physical trait.
The greeting gambit
Saying "it's nice to see you" instead of "it's nice to meet you" is rooted in the idea that many social encounters are not actually the first time you've seen someone. In today's interconnected world, you might have come across someone's photos or posts on social media. (Yes, it happens; I've had someone who felt bad that I didn't remember them from our social media connection.)You might have heard about them from mutual friends or even seen them in a previous event, webinar or video call. By acknowledging this, you're not treating the encounter as entirely new but instead as a continuation of a relationship, no matter how brief or distant. Plus, this has the added benefit of not offending someone you've previously met.
For example, a business associate once brought his wife to a party at my home. Many months later, I ran into her at a grocery store, which was a completely different context. I recognized her face, but I had no idea where I knew her from. When she came up and said hello, I said, "Hi, it's great to see you." She then talked about how much she enjoyed the party, and voila — it immediately came back to me where I met her.
So, there it is — the ultimate guide to name mastery. No more awkward moments of standing there with a polite smile while your mind is screaming, Who are you?! With these additional techniques in your networking toolkit, you'll be a name-remembering maestro in no time. So go forth and conquer those social and business events confidently, knowing you won't be left in the awkward abyss of forgotten names.